#24: Fandango is easy. I've actually used this one. I tried to get tickets to a work-related conference at Fandango,
forgetting that they only had tickets for movies.
Oregon
Wednesday 24th of September 2008 2:40 am
#24: Fandango is easy. I've actually used this one. I tried to get tickets to a work-related conference at Fandango,
forgetting that they only had tickets for movies. |
 #50 ebay can definitely be work-related. It is one of the best places to find cheap ink cartridges, etc. Also very
useful for comparison shopping of industrial equipment. |
 #42 Fan Fiction sites can be work related if the characters include: Jan from accounting, Javier from maintenance, Wanda
from accounts receivable, and Harry from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. |
 Youtube actually has some great professional conference videos. I've used it for that purpose in the past.
After looking at falling cats and emo teens... |
 I love the fact that you've rated Cockeyed significantly more work-related than Defective Yeti. Matt's gonna be _pissed_
:-)
Excuse for song lyrics site "I had the song stuck in my head but I couldn't remember the words. It was driving me
bananas - it was getting so bad that I couldn't concentrate on work, so I had to check" |
 If you work for a company that develops either a web browser or web content:
"I'm testing our browser and comparing our competitors' products with this site"
"I want to know how to achieve this effect in CSS/JavaScript"
etc
|
 Boing Boing has so much advertising on it, you could use the excuse that you heard that a competitor was running adverts
on there and you wanted to check it out to see whether there was anything that could be done better by your company.
Actually, that could cover virtually any website above #51! |
 For anything below 30 or so: You were maintaining your work-life balance. |
It must have been a bug in Chrome. |
 blame Canada...thatll fix all your problems... |
 Digg and similar sites are bookmarked on the machines at my work, as "keeping up with technology" is one of our goals.
Too bad I spend most of the time on digg looking at pictures of cats with funny captions. |
"It wasn't me..." |
 You could take the Best Buy/Geek Squad approach and blame everything on spyware... |
 Viewing video pornography is necessary research in preparation for drafting a sales training manual for just about
anything. One must be able to communicate the utter revulsion to the competitor's products. As any good writer knows,
accessing the core values necessary to communicate such sentiments can only be accomplished by experiencing something as
repellent as a good fisting. |
porn sites are ok. Just start jerking it, and get a personal day!
|
iTunes is fine. There is nothing wrong with having music in the background. If you download them from iTunes, you
company does not have to worry about having illegal copies of music/video on its hard drives and employees reduce
clutter by leaving their CD collection at home. |
Well, OBVIOUSLY we need to know if our own software products' serial numbers are floating around on warez sites, right?
Right? |
 Hovercraft |
my computer is infected with malware (ack!) |
Reddit is easy. With all the links about the 700 billion dollar buy outs, you can just say you're trying to figure out
how bad your company will be hit. |
 #43 Say that you were thinking about using Yammer as a communication platform at work, so you decided to test-drive its
brother, Twitter, before jumping in to the corporate version. |
 #28 My boss thought cockeyed was a pornographic site, and blocked it!
|
 Number 39, IMDB... when you work in the film industry, it is looked upon quite often. Or, often enough. YouTube, too,
but then again that's just so we can laugh at people's videos of them doing weird monologues. |
 2. Fedex / UPS / USPS
Its simple, I am looking to find the best deal for shipping. i HAVE TO UNLOAD 100 COPIES OF MY RESUME ALL OVER THE
COUNTRY. |
 #28 cockeyed - "I was researching ways to save on cost around the office, AirMail and Refilling an Ink Catridge could
save this company thousands!" |
# 28 cockeyed - " i was looking for an excuse to why I'm on cockeyed.com" |
 Savage love could be a little higher on the list, it's just an advice column. What about sites like ogrish and rotten?
What's worse, looking at nice, harmless porn, or looking at mangled corpses? |
I used to look at white supremacist message boards all the time because I find them fascinating and hilarious. I
realized that if I were busted, there could really be no excuse. I probably wouldn't get fired, but I would be
stigmatized worse than if I was looking at porn. |
16. banking and bill pay sites> you could say that you're trying to find a better bank for the company or good interest
rates.. |
 i like the old "i was trying to close a pop-up add and opened the site by accident - oh, i had it open for 45 minutes
you say? well it must have been behind my excel spreadsheet i was working on and i didn't realize it!" |
Any porn or video or file sharing site: "testing server load."
It's practically a code word these days.
|
If you work at a printer company like I do, you can claim you were at cockeyed.com to find out how much ink is in an ink
cartridge. I don't know how I'm going to explain all those pictures of Brooke I saved off though! RRRRRRrrr! |
 I'm not even a state.
I feel like such a poser. |
Not very fair, but when I used to write porn huntin' software for SurfControl (now deceased) anything was fair game.
Craigslist and Dice.com were still a little awkward until it became obvious our competitor was going to buy us out and
screw all the peons... |
I use wikipedia as a one-stop shop for every piece of information I need. I designed a mangosteen flavoured drink based
entirely on the description of the flavour on wiki once!! mmm citrussy peach!! |
Sheet! I'm in Aleebamee! |
 #5. The Lancet - "You don't pay me enough, and I needed a picture of Ben Franklin's eye to finish a sweet counterfeit
$100 bill I'm printing on company stationary." |
#54. still and video pornography - In my last nine jobs, I have used these videos to improve my skills in communicating
with office secretaries. |
You know, most of us Cockeyed fans keep bitching about how there's not much new content. After all, the wife, kid, job,
and home should all take a backseat to immature internet prowlers. But we can all rejoice, because in a little over a
month we get a new halloween costume article. hooray! |
Let's go for broke and excuse the porn site; I was clicking through a legitimate work-related site (not the companies
own site) when I found that the site was hacked! Somebody had changed all the links to porn links. When I tried to
close one, another just popped up in it's place! Why can't the IT department get better popup-blockers on my system? |
I am in the Army and we are actually told to keep one eye open on Snopes for new viruses and what not. Government
networks are pretty strict so if we can go to Snopes, anybody should. |
I've been chained to this desk, locked in this cubicle for so long that I have to use #30. online photo albums - to see
what my kids look like |
They could come here once every three months and see if there's anything new, won't take long |
They could come here once every three months and see if there's anything new, won't take long |
 I visited those warez sites to double-check that none of the serial numbers on our recently purchased software had
gotten onto those naughty sites. |
 I look like a penis. |
It's very simple. "I can see Russia from my house" |
I work for a media company, so I actually *have* to visit YouTube, eBay, and other regularly to check for bootlegs of
our titles and pull them down. And yep, we produce porn, too. |
 *Become* the person in IT who generates the Web usgae reports. |
"As long as I'm meeting my deadlines and producing top-quality work, what do you care what websites I browse?"
This pretty much works, at least at my job. Or it would, if I was ever called on how I structure my work habits, which
I'm not. |
 I was making sure nobody from New Jersey was posing as Washington DC'rs |
 I was just making sure nobody from Washington DC was posing as a Marylander |
I was making sure nobody from Maryland was posing as a New Jerseyian |
 Twitter is a fabulous networking tool. |
Wow - look at all the Hawaii's. |
 Just man up, say you didn't know it was against company policy, but it won't happen again. Be so up front and direct
that your boss loses his thunder, you can't be disciplined for anything you confess to in this manner, haven't tried
murder yet but good luck! |
Tell your boss to suck it! |
 Warez sites and other piracy sites could be called research into the piracy of the company's goods if the company is in
the software business. |
45. Looking for a companion for your boss.
Result: PROMOTION! |
1. My old boss actually yelled at me once for visiting the company's own web site. I don't work there anymore. And I
may send that boss a box of dog poop for Christmas. |
 I just wanted Iowa to be represented. |
 If you are caught browsing cockeyed.com, you could just say you were checking for a pulse so you could make sure the
website was completely dead. (Hint: we need new content.) |
use an ssh tunnel so work doesnt know where you go. |
#54 - TRAINING - you will simply showing fellow coworkers what types of sites are considered off limits. |
I'll add one, YTMND:
Sponsoring sites with their product in them work for Razor Gator, it can work for us too! |
 Oklahoma: Twitter isn't a networking tool! Now Wireshark, *that* is a good networking tool. Oh, and netcat! and Telnet
can be useful too. Let's not forget SSH! |
I love those pictures of hot chicks on the Lancet! |
IovWp2 pmwcteflenmn, [url=http://hebbtwkriolb.com/]hebbtwkriolb[/url],
[link=http://ihatdnbfbabu.com/]ihatdnbfbabu[/link], http://grigludxhawe.com/ |
 For any of the sites, just say that you wanted to improve your company web site, and you were doing research as to its
usability. |
[URL=http://ihaihlcm.com]xssfjisa[/URL] rsgxzvai http://tfjsxsbq.com ghqizyeq vpxkdqcj sntrfzkn |
#54 - As a developer I want to keep myself abreast of the new and startling developments in the Web community to ensure
my full exposure to the potential of the medium |
#14 Gmail - Sorry, I must have had my proxy turned off. It won't happen again; I promise. |
One time, I was looking on ebay for something and my boss caught me, and I told her I was looking for something special
for her birthday lol |
There are people from other parts of the world who would also like to comment here! |