The Light Sharpener

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The next victim for the Light Sharpener was a Frosted Cherry Pop Tart.

I had heard that the cherry filling in these things can burst into flame and shoot out of the top. I had also heard that they taste delicious when toasted to a golden brown.

Could the light sharpener generate anything close to the crippling heat of those 8 glowing wires inside your toaster?

Nick handled the tart pole.

The tart does not burst into flames. I think the video offers conclusive proof that solar heat is perfect for roasting breakfast snacks indoors, if your house is already on fire.


Next, we tried a bar of Irish Spring bath soap.

Soap is made from fat, so I thought it might burn, or melt in an interesting way.

It was a slow show at first, but soon the soap heated up and started to liquify. Smoke poured off of the bar, and hot drips of soap fell like downed fighter jets, leaving thick trails of smoke. This is also known as "Irish Fireworks".

What I didn't expect was the smell! The whole backyard smelled like a spring to a forest fire.

I think I've bought a total of 5 records in my life, and one was this Book of Love album from 1986. I think I bought this from Marc Nolfi after he upgraded to the CD... or perhaps he had just recorded it to cassette tape.

In any case, this would be the end.



Thin black vinyl. It didn't stand a chance.

It lasted about 20 seconds, the black plastic falling like a tablecloth. A few hunks dripped away and broke free.

And finally, to the required cute toy destruction sequence. A "My Little Pony".

This little fella was rescued from the "Sac's Thrift Avenue" thrift store on Fruitridge Drive in Sacramento. I combed her hair and did my best to braid it before taking these pictures. Unfortunately, the fellas came by to watch Hockey, so I hid her under the couch until it was dish-burning time.

Jason claimed to have barbequed a horse in the past, so we let him do the honors.

The pony survived!

Tthe wire harness failed when it got hot. I had attempted to find harness guidelines on the web, but when I did a search for "hung like a horse" the Google results were clogged with Stephen Colbert references.

Although her tail and mane were melted into plasticware, her light skin saved her from suffering much damage. Tragically, her dark-colored pupil had been crispified, so we had to shoot her anyway.

Please continue reading page 22 of the Light Sharpener

Intro Build Foil Mirror Burn Epilogue FAQ
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15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22

23 FAQ

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August 28, 2007.   Terms and Conditions  Copyright 2007